Tag: #todontlist

Month 10 Week 1 – Walk It Off

“All truly great thoughts are conceived by walking” – Friedrich Nietzsche

This month I was having a hard time deciding what I wanted to do for a challenge. While usually something pops in my head this month I had nothing. What actually happened was I was at work and the day went from 0 to 100 and I needed to breathe. I hopped up from my chair, threw on my walking shoes and headed outside. I had previously tried to walk though issues by hopping on the treadmill but this time I needed to get out of my house I was so heated.

As usual I threw on some AirPods and started moving. Before I knew what happened the stress was starting to go away. I was at ease and thought how great this felt and how I needed to do this more often. In the midst of my excitement guess what? My phone rang. It was my job. I was immediately mad again and thought I had to figure something out. I needed to make this a challenge and figure out how to pull it off. I was going to have a heart attack at this rate.

I decided that I would walk at least 10,000 steps a day. I normally say something like I will walk a mile, or I will walk a 5K and while that has great results I can pull that off in one block of time. I knew if I was going to do 10,000 steps it was going to take some work. Now let me fill you in on something. This challenge for the first time was not about the 10,000 steps. This was about me knowing I would have to get my butt up several times per day and walk. It was about taking myself out of stressful situations and just moving. I was right.

First day I had to do two walks and got 8569 steps. Second day I walked three times and got 9042 steps. I told myself that I would just focus on walking more than the day before if I didn’t reach the 10K. I also made a promise that if I got 10K I would not decide 11K was the new goal. I’m crazy like that. Day 3 – 9823. Day 4 -11251. Day 5 – 7704.

What I liked about this challenge was that I felt good. It was hard, but I felt good afterwards. I started going to the park to walk for different scenery. Instead of being upset I had to take my son to school so early I decided since I was up I might as well walk and get it out of the way. After dinner I would think “its still light outside” and go for a walk. Walking didn’t require me to stress about anything except good socks and shoes. I love my Asics, yes this is a plug.

I want to tell you I’m not some walking pro. My whole body hurts which is still annoying me. I came home one day and whined to my husband how hard walking was. My feet were hurting so bad I didn’t think I could keep walking. He told me to just change my route. That morning I had decided to try some hills that I apparently was not ready for. I’m glad he gave me that piece of advice because I kept walking. I just took a flat path.

So this month I challenge you to walk. Yep just walk. Can you get 10,000 steps a day? Can you get more steps than you did the day before? I think you can. Throw on some shoes and enjoy this fall weather. I’m enjoying this so much I can see myself walking through the winter. Truth is I just can’t do the heat. I am miserable in the summer. Oh and I lost a pound. All that walking had me so tired I kept going to bed early. If I’m sleep I can’t eat. If you haven’t figured it out I will take my wins anyway I can get them.

Here are my last few days of walking. Today is Oct 2 and I have four more walkable hours so I’m killing it. I left a good chunk of info so you can see I really wasn’t moving at all. Yea not even trying. September 20th and 23rd I don’t know what was going on but I didn’t move at all. I wish I could tell you I was sick, but that would be a lie. Clearly a challenge I needed. Show me your numbers?

Month 9 Week 4

“Find time to love yourself, just the way you are” – M. Ross

I have started watching Fantasy Island. I know it’s crazy. I never watched the original but somehow I’ve gotten hooked on the remake. The episode this past week was about a heavyset woman who’s goal was to be thin. There was much more involved with the story but I don’t want to ruin it for anyone who watches the show. Fast forward, she is able to get her fantasy of being thin but with consequences.

What I want to talk about this week is the back story. The woman was successful, wasn’t married, but otherwise had her shit together. She appeared by the words of her friends to really have her life in order. With all of that going for her she wanted to be thin (I promise you I’m leaving parts out). She was not as shallow as I’m making her sound.

Ironically, this made me think about myself. I’m married to a man that loves me, I have two amazing boys who are doing well in school, play sports, and have so many friends I can’t keep up. There is no talk of drugs, crazy girls, cyber bullying, and they appear to love their lives. I have a job I love and work with a team of people who love their job. I am able to travel and enjoy spur of the moment football games and family outings without worrying about what we can afford. My major stresses in life involve being able to get the world enough food. Remember I buy meat. We have money in the bank and my son is on a path to becoming the richest man in the world (his ambition is contagious). Looking at my life from the outside in looks fantastic. Guess what? Looking at my life from the inside it looks fantastic. This is my real life.

There is no show going on. My life is really this fantastic. And then there is that elephant in the room. I am unhappy with my weight. I’m not unhappy enough to get crazy about it, but I’m unhappy enough where I keep talking about it and keep trying to lose weight and change my outward appearance. I’m unhappy enough to build a gym and start a blog. I’m unhappy enough to feel like I’ve failed at this one thing. Why?

I have great skin, great hair, tiny wrists and ankles, great nails, and overall I’m healthy. I get my blood work done every six months and make sure I see my doctor often. Now I do have some issues that I’ve talked to you all about. Back pain, knee pain, and just some overall body aches from carrying this weight. This is why I want to lose the weight, but in the process I don’t want to lose myself. I don’t want to stop loving the person I am and the life I lead.

I believe as people try to lose weight they fear they may lose a little bit of themselves. I know I struggle with this. I struggle with balancing the great life I have and not feeling ungrateful that I want some things to change. I struggle knowing people would kill for what I have yet I’m looking to change myself. That fine line between gratitude and being selfish is one that for me gets thinner and thinner daily.

Who would have thought watching an episode of Fantasy Island would have me questioning so many things about my life. Kudos to the writers.

This is what I want to end the month with. I need to learn to love myself. I need to love the fat or the thin. I need to want to lose weight so I can spend more days with these kids and not to look some type of way. I speak a lot about healthy but I think a heathy mindset is what I need more than anything.

This month I lost four pounds. I lost those four pounds simply by trying to be better than yesterday. It was easy making a “To Don’t ” list since I’m always stressing about what I need to do. As I begin to enter the next phase on this journey I want everyone reading to know that today I realize I have to do this for myself. I have to find my thin line.

My thin line will not be your thin line. You have to find the strength within yourself to do what’s best for you. Ask yourself as you end the month what were you constantly telling yourself to not do? Did you build some better habits? I can’t eat after 7pm. I know it seems silly but for me I was struggling with that daily. My hunger is never ending and most likely all in my mind. Everything is always swirling in my mind.

I so hope this week was a winner for you. I hope this month was eye opening. I hope as always to see you next week. Remember, we’ve got this. One pound at a time.

Month 9 Week 3

“Mistakes are proof you are trying” -Unknown

After a long pause my husband has started working out again. I see him struggle the same way I struggle. You can have all the tools available in your arsenal and still struggle.

I continue to push myself daily and I’m beginning to see my husband do the same. I’ve often heard women say it’s easy for men to lose weight and men don’t even have to try. If that were the case there would be no fat men. Let’s be honest they are struggling just like we are.

My husband has to resist the same cake that I resist. The double chocolate cake I baked for my sons birthday. It sits on the table calling both our names. He has to resist the ice cream in the freezer. He has to drink water and drag himself to the gym.

I often forget that he struggles just like me. When I fill the house with snacks he’s tempted just like me. Time and time again I would get angry when I emptied the house of snacks and he would find his way to the store. I realize he’s probably just as mad at me when I fill the house with cookies and cakes. We both say it’s for the kids when we know that a lie.

The irony is when I decide I’m not eating snacks I won’t eat them. I don’t pause and realize that someone’s going to eat them. They don’t magically disappear.

I need to do better.

This week on my “To Don’t List” I’m writing don’t buy sugary snacks. This small change will help us all. I have to reduce, not eliminate. If I eliminate the snacks next week I will just buy double, I know myself.

This weeks goal is to help someone else. Whether that’s my husband or my kids I’m going to try to be just a little better. Make a healthier meal, have more fruits and veggies, and of course less snacks.

We may not both decide at the same time we need to be healthy, but I can do my best to support him even when I’m struggling. Together we should be able to get a couple of steps further along in our journey. If not we will just drag the weaker one.

I guess you could say that’s a major part of marriage. Helping your spouse when you’re not very steady yourself. Maybe it’s just a part of my marriage.

Month 9 Week 1

“Deciding what not to do is as important as deciding what to do” – Steve Jobs

I am the queen of making a “To do List”. Each night I make a list of the things I plan to do the next day. Yesterday I wrote I needed to get my blog done today. I seriously think you always need a plan if you plan to get anything done. My list are a little more lax on the weekends but come Sunday night you will catch me with my planner and fancy pen getting ready for Monday.

I am also a big fan of time blocking. I decide what my “One Thing” will be and make sure I get that accomplished first thing in the morning. If you have not checked out that book you need to. It really transformed how I think about things on a day to day basis.

Plug for “The One Thing” by Gary Keller.

Ironically this post is not about a to do list. It’s about a to don’t list. I didn’t even plan for this to be my thing for the month but as usual God had another plan. Last week I took my son on The Donut Trail. The Donut Trail consist of twelve local donut shops in our area. You start off by getting a passport from either a donut shop or online. At each stop you collect a stamp and when you have all the stamps you get a free t-shirt. For the past three years my son and I have done the trail in one day. Yes we drive to twelve donut shops and each get a donut and a stamp. When we are done we pick up our free t-shirt then head to breakfast. If you are thinking this is insane it is. What makes it crazier is we have to start at 6am-7am because many of the donuts shops run out of donuts and close. If you miss one stamp you get no t-shirt. That would defeat the purpose of the adventure so we set our alarms and get moving.

To be clear you don’t have to do the trail in one day. Its just so much fun and such a bonding thing its become tradition. We look forward to our free shirt and we always wear them for the first day of school. We almost missed this year due to Covid but we were so glad all the shops were able to reopen. Not only do we get to support local businesses but just spending time with my kids is priceless.

As you can imagine coming home with twelve donuts a piece is crazy. What stresses me more is that all the donuts are delicious. I am not going to post pictures of the donuts but I really wanted to. My favorite is The Buckeye. This is a cake donut with peanut butter cream in the center drizzled with chocolate. It’s as good as it sounds. My sons favorite is a glaze donut that is topped lucky charms. If that was the extent of the great donuts we wouldn’t be fat. No there was a cheesecake donut this year, apple fritters the size of bears claws, something called a sugar square which is exactly what it sounds like, and a chocolate/vanilla twist. Every year I think I have seen it all and these artisans surprise me. Donut making is an art and I give these bakeries all the credit for getting up at 1am to make donuts. FYI- two of the shops open at 3am.

I’m sorry. I have you all wanting donuts. Snap out of it.

Anywho because of this donut wonderland the first day I ate three donuts. The second day I ate three more. I realized at this rate I would eat a dozen donuts in four days and that just sounded fat. Not as fat at eating a dozen Krispie Kreme because you see the “Hot and Ready” sign but just as fat. By the way I don’t eat Krispie Kreme donuts. I’m not a glaze fan but I put the reference in the blog for my best friend. She better be reading this. I hope the shame prevents her from eating the whole dozen.

Getting back to my point. By day three I realized I needed to do something. On the top of my journal I wrote “I will not eat a donut today”. That was it. That simple phrase. I was going to call it a win if I made it through the day without eating a donut. Guess what? I did.

I don’t know if that was the spark that got me going in the right direction but it seemed like I got my mojo back after that. The next day I wrote “I’m not going to sit during my conference call”. I didn’t write what I was going to do, but I knew I wasn’t going to sit. When the time came for the conference call I got out of my chair and figured I might as well walk on the treadmill. Twenty minutes later I had a mile in and had completed another task on my to don’t list. As much as I loved checking off the boxes on a to do list. Putting a check mark next to the to don’t list felt ten times better.

I wasn’t beating myself up. I was simply naming one thing that I wouldn’t do that day. Each day was different but each day meant something. Another day I wrote “I will not drink soda”. The funniest one for me was “I won’t complain about eating vegetables”. Each time I didn’t do that one thing and each day I felt like I had accomplished something. You want to know the best side effect of all this? I felt my depression leaving me. I was having more good days versus bad days. As a bonus I lost a pound. Yes I am back to 270. Being prediabetic I decided to start testing my sugar again and I decided I like the way I felt so I wanted to keep it going.

I believe timing is everything. Always having a list of a million things to get done was not working. Here is an example of what my weight loss to do list would look like:

  1. Drink 64 ounces of water. I never did this
  2. Eat three healthy meals
  3. Don’t eat any snacks. Didn’t even come close.
  4. Workout for 30 minutes
  5. Meditate or do yoga. It sounds good.
  6. Close your Apple Rings.

Do you see the kind of pressure I put on myself. I was writing this list every day and usually it was much longer. Please note this is my weight loss list, not even my list for work or home stuff. Just getting this on paper each day was a chore. I went from all of the above to “Don’t sit during your conference call”. That was the switch I needed to get myself together.

I’m so glad I was able to finally begin to get over the hump of the depression haze. I’m not turning off my brights just yet but I am better. I’m a little behind my weightless schedule but I am much better than I was before. I’ve lost 20 pounds in nine months and I have no intention on gaining it back. Even with the weight I gained back over this time there are 10 pounds that are gone from my frame forever.

My message this week is to create a to don’t list. Stay focused so you can spend more time celebrating your wins instead of killing yourself with things you need to do. I tell people all the time “You know what to do. You don’t need me to tell you what to do”. I need to take that advice myself. I know what to do. I just need to focus daily on listing the one thing I won’t do for the day so I can celebrate all the things I did do. I’m changing my mindset a little each day.